«Как воспитывать любовью?»
С чего началось?
Прочитала в Контакте пост-статью Руслана Нарушевича «Женщине нужна любовь-забота, а мужчине – любовь-доверие». Казалось, суть уже ясна из заголовка без дальнейшего прочтения. Но мне захотелось акцентировать внимание на деталях рационального зерна воспитания. Так я решила сделать рерайт поста в своей интерпретации.
Медаль одна – материнская любовь. Сторон две – забота и доверие.
Кому какую любовь нужно дать?
Для воспитания мужественности, целеустремлённости, силы Духа важна вторая сторона медали.
Излишняя забота их портит. Природой изначально заложено мальчикам силу иметь.
Им нужно:
- признание («Я учусь на своих ошибках и добиваюсь успеха!»);
- доверие («Положитесь на меня!») ;
- вера в благополучный исход события. (« Всё будет в порядке!», «Ты справишься!»)
Мужчину трудности и нагрузки держат в тонусе, стабилизируют. Отсутствие их — расслабляет, выматывает.
Для воспитания женственности требуется забота о дочке.
Ей очень важно чувствовать себя любимой. Только тогда она сможет смотреть спокойно на кошмары и вдохновлять мужчину на подвиги.
Нагрузки женщину изматывают. Отдых наполняет её силой.
Какая мама сможет дать любовь-доверие сыну и любовь-заботу дочке?
Лишь та, которая позволила себе получать любовь-заботу — источник силы и энергии для проявления любви-доверия. Если решила жить ради детей – погубит обоих.
Мать-одиночка весь потенциал любви передаст сыночку своему. Тому, кому он не нужен. Начинает вмешиваться в его жизнь, давать то, что сама хотела бы получить. В молодом человеке срабатывает механизм ГМО – генетика модифицируется, он расслабляется. В ответ даёт матери (жене) любовь-доверие: «Сходи туда… Сделай то… Разберись … Договорись…Купи и принеси…». Знакомо, милые мамы?
«Тот, кто должен получать заботу, всё больше и больше получает доверие, а тот, кто должен получать доверие, всё больше получает заботу. Даём не то, что нужно!» Это и есть основа для деградации отношений и личности.
Вывод. Остановит процесс лишь женщина., получившая знание и научившаяся правильно просить.
«Дорогой сынок! Мне приятно твоё доверие. Я это очень ценю! Но мне как-то хочется больше заботы!»
С уважением Лавката.
Спасибо большое за подробную информацию.
С огромным удовольствием!
Благодарю за Вашу оценку!
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